


Poor Yurik

by dragyn42



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-31
Updated: 2019-03-31
Packaged: 2020-02-28 09:00:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,462
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18753190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dragyn42/pseuds/dragyn42
Summary: Why was Harry handcuffed by someone who wasn't his wife? A follow-up to Yurik, the one-shot by pottermum which can be found in her collection Catch Her Snitch, with permission.





	Poor Yurik

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Catch Her Snitch!](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14124723) by [pottermum](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pottermum/pseuds/pottermum). 



They were all in the office of Kingsley Shacklebolt, and 'all' was a motley crew. Kingsley himself sat behind his mahogany desk, littered with neat stacks of paper, the only clear area a black, leather desk blotter directly in front of him. Standing to his side was Head Auror Gawain Robards, his gaze an inscrutable stare at those sitting opposed him across the desk. Off to the side, on the cushy, tan, cotton fabric sofa that Kingsley used to entertain his more intimate and less business discussions sat Harry Potter. And despite the room for three people on the sofa, his wife Ginny Potter was sitting close enough to practically be in his lap.

In front of them, on the fine, neo-modern, wooden coffee table, was laid out some finger foods. While an official rebuke was not usually a catered affair, Harry could not resist helping himself to the little, savory tartlets – crispy philo cups filled with a mix of ground lamb and corn and topped with mashed potatoes. Ginny merely wore a self satisfied smirk every time Harry popped one in his mouth.

At the end of the coffee table was the matching chair that Kingsley usually sat in. Lightly padded seat, back, and arm rests with the same tan fabric as the sofa were held together by a wooden frame that was identical to that of the coffee table. It was currently occupied by Hermione Granger-Weasley, the Potter's acting solicitor. Her gaze kept alternating, one moment resigned that there was no way to stop Harry from eating at such an important meeting, especially not with Ginny silently egging him on, and the next moment incensed at the wizards currently under judgment by Kingsley.

Opposite Hermione at the other end of the coffee table, in a matching chair, was Rhonda, a Ministry employee working at the staff canteen. It was she, unsure of the protocol of such a summons, who brought the foods. She had heard that there would be several important folks from the Ministry at the meeting, and it was bad form to show up at a gathering with nothing in hand, so she took it upon herself to make sure there were refreshments. The Minister had merely smiled and thanked her, offering the use of his coffee table to set them out, but Mr. Potter seemed thrilled with the goodies.

She honestly was still not entirely sure why she had been asked to appear. Surely there were enough people of import that her own version of events wasn't needed, but Mr. Potter was always a great person to her, and the Minister himself had asked her to appear, after all.

And, finally, the stars of the show were seated at the business side of the desk in perfunctory, wooden chairs. Their high, horizontally slatted backs were clearly designed by some sadist to look nice but be absolute torture for the occupants. Senior Auror Miguel Juan, Auror To Vihn, and Junior Auror Jackson Trey each wore different expressions under the scrutiny of the Minister of Magic. Auror Juan was clearly not bothered by the events. He would probably stand by his decisions til death. He even kept shooting glares of disgust towards Harry.

Auror To was, to all appearances, disgruntled. Certainly he was not a fan of Harry's, but he was also was sure to walk the line. He believed rules had to be followed or they were no worse than they criminals they tracked. It was probably the main reason he and Harry didn't get along. It was clear he thought the rules were followed, and he was annoyed that things had escalated the way they had.

Auror Trey was the one Harry felt actually felt sorry for. As a Junior Auror, fresh out of training, he was only following orders. And on the surface of it, he had no real choice, not with Miguel calling the shots; not if he wanted to continue as an Auror. But to be ordered to act against Harry Potter, The Chosen One, and one of their own, no less, was not the push for his career he had been looking for. Harry was glad that Jackson had tried to be accommodating, (maybe a little bit too much so,) given the situation he found himself in. But, at this moment, he looked like he expected to lose his job by the time he left the office.

"Okay, let me try to understand this," started a very perturbed Minister of Magic.

Kingsley's basso interrupted Harry's thoughts, drawing his attention back to the show. Of course, he had to snag another mini-pie first.

"You, Auror Juan, decided to arrest Auror Harry Potter, in public, over a dead body."

"It wasn't an arrest, Minister," the Auror responded confidently.

"It wasn't?" asked Kingsley. "Then why was he handcuffed?"

"Mr. Potter was handcuffed because he refused to surrender his wand," said Auror Juan.

"And you asked Auror Potter for his wand why?" Kingsley inquired.

"We informed him, in accordance with the law and evidence at hand, that we needed to confiscate his wand as he was under investigation."

"I see," said Kingsley, hiding any form of disbelief in his voice.

Kingsley may have been an extremely experienced Auror and interrogator, but Harry had come to know him well, and knew that this form of questioning was Kingsley at his most dangerous.

"Let's look at the evidence, shall we?" prompted Kingsley. "Poor Yurik. Harry knew him. An Auror of powerful temper, and most eager lawfulness. He was partnered with Auror Potter a thousand hours, and now… Well, that's enough of that. The first partner since the departing of Auror Weasley, over a year ago, that Auror Potter could work with. And your first thought upon finding his body was that Auror Potter, a wizard who has been fighting – and defeating – evil since his childhood, did it? Please, explain that to me."

"Mr. Potter has never held the rules in high regard. And it's clear that he respects Aurors and our rules even less…"

"Excuse me," piped up Harry from the sofa. "I respect Aurors just fine. It's you I have a problem with."

"Harry," admonished Head Auror Robards, though there was no real bite to his statement.

Harry ate another tartlet in response, smiling as he chewed. Ginny snickered; Hermione merely shook her head.

Picking back up from where he left off, satisfied that Potter had been reprimanded, Auror Juan asked, "He clearly has no respect. Yurik's body was found in his office. What else was I supposed to think?"

Harry opened his mouth to say something, in all likelihood something flippant, but was silenced by a glance from the Minister. The smile never left Harry's face however.

"Who found Yurik in Auror Potter's office?" asked Kingsley.

"Pardon?" asked Auror To, while Auror Juan asked, "What does it matter?"

"Ooh! Ooh! I know this one!" cried out Harry from the sofa, bouncing in his seat, his hand raised. Ginny fell into him, laughing silently.

"Auror Potter!" said Kingsley. "Will you please cut that out!"

Harry lowered his hand and affected a frown that not a single person in the room took seriously.

"Mr. Juan," said Robards, "we are discussing the evidence. The evidence you claim gave you due cause to go after one of our own. Who _found_ the body would be considered a part of that evidence. Answer the Minister's question: Who found the body?"

"Off the top of my head, I'm not sure. It was yelled in the office, and those of us present went to look. It was the first break in a months old case. We immediately put a group together and went to question Mr. Potter as a person of interest," said Auror Juan. Auror To passed an odd look at the Senior Auror.

"I doubt that," said Robards. "Would you care to revise your statement?"

"My statement stands. Someone found the body, we all looked, put a team together, and apprehended Mr. Potter."

"Yes," said Harry. "Apprehended. Halfway across the building and down two floors. Your team was certainly taxed on that one."

"Harry," said Kingsley, now clearly exasperated.

"I'll give you one more chance to change, or otherwise expand upon, your statement," instructed Robards.

Auror Juan maintained his confidence and stated, "I have nothing to add."

"Why is this important?" asked Auror To.

There was silence for several moments as several people looked first at Harry, and then everyone finished by looked at Kingsley and Robards, awaiting an answer.

"Because," explained Robards, "Harry keeps his office locked."

"I don't understand," said Auror To. "Everyone with offices keeps them locked."

"No, you _don't_ understand," agreed Robards.

Kingsley picked up, the voice of the Minister lending a supreme authorization to his explanation, "Due to Auror Potter's fame and notoriety, it was determined that for his safety, and that of everyone in the Auror Department, Harry keeps a series of charms and jinxes on his office door. Only Harry can open it without a key, and there are only two keys to the door."

"Three," Harry chimed in.

"Pardon?" asked Kingsley.

"There are three keys to the door," said Harry.

"Myself, the Head Auror, and who?" asked Kingsley.

The answer was immediately apparent when Ginny leaned in to kiss her husband.

"Harry!" cried out Kingsley and Hermione together, while Robards shook his head.

"What? The guide book clearly states that unless otherwise ordered, not only is it allowed, but it's expected that Aurors will discuss their jobs with their spouses. I know; I checked. And Ginny has been fully vetted," explained Harry as if it was obvious.

"Besides," picked up Ginny. "He keeps leaving his handcuffs at home. I know he has several pairs and all, but if I didn't keep returning them, he'd have none. How else am I to return them when he's in the field?"

Hermione nearly fell out of her chair, but the surprise was the otherwise forgotten and ignored lunch lady.

"Handcuffs? Really?" Rhonda asked.

"Oh, absolutely!" answered Ginny.

"Here," said Harry, pulling out the pair he had on him, (he was in uniform after all,) and handing them to her. "They make all the difference in the world."

"Harry!" came the simultaneous cries of Kingsley, Robards, and Hermione.

"What?" he asked innocently, holding his hands out, palms up, in the universal sign of confusion.

"You see?!" shouted out Auror Juan, "He clearly has no respect for anything!"

"Not the point," muttered Robards, who then continued, "It's clear you're missing this. His office is locked. Only he or… _three_ other people can enter it when he is not there. The spells work to keep the door locked without him present. Should he leave without locking the door – though he does lock it, every time, I've watched – his door will be locked moments after he leaves."

"So who else could have put the body in there?! You're only making the case!" said Auror Juan. "We were right to go after him!"

"Ooh! Ooh! I know this one!" cried out Ginny from the sofa, bouncing in her seat, her hand raised. Harry grimaced as she bounced practically in his lap.

"Ginny," admonished Kingsley, resigned. He had clearly given up any hope of keeping the Potters in line.

"That's actually pretty depressing," muttered Hermione.

"Who. Found. The. Body?" asked Head Auror Robards once more, clearly frustrated with everything by this point.

"Seriously," commented Harry, pretending to whisper to Ginny, but loud enough for everyone to hear. "How did he make Senior Auror?"

Aurors To and Trey both seemed to understand at the same time and gasped, looking astonished at Senior Auror Juan.

"What?!" cried out Auror Juan, more a statement than a question, extremely frustrated that everyone had seemingly figured out something he hadn't.

It was Auror Trey that answered, "No one could _just find_ a body in Harry's office. No one could just walk in! Whoever found the body had to break their way through the spells. They're the one who put the body there."

"Which," said Hermione, finishing the line of thought, "is why you were told there were signs on the body of tampering which in no way could match up to Harry. It's why you had to end the questioning!"

Silence reigned through the office for a minute as everyone thought through the chain of events and evidence as provided – well, silence except for the sounds of Harry chewing and swallowing yet another shepards mini-pie. "These are really good!" he told Rhonda, a satisfied smile on his face.

"Auror Juan. It is clear your feelings for Auror Potter interfered with your ability to do your job. You are henceforth suspended for one month without pay," stated Head Auror Robards. "Junior Auror Trey, I'm tasking you with tracking down the person, whoever they may be, who left Yurik's body in Auror Potter's office. If you need help, you have the authority for the remainder of this investigation to task Auror To with anything you may need. Auror To, do you have any problem with this?"

The Vietnamese Auror looked back and forth between the Head Auror and the Junior Auror, accepting his penance. "No, sir."

"Good," said Robards. "Auror Potter, until this matter is cleared, you are on paid leave. Please do not interfere."

Harry grinned at Robards, then leered lecherously at his wife, who was by this point _actually_ in his lap. "Of course not, Gawain."

"Very well," said Kingsley, glad to have some semblance of control. "I am glad this has been cleared up. I thank everyone for coming in."

Ginny reached over and grabbed one more tartlet for the road, feeding it to Harry, before she hopped off his lap and held out her hand to help him up. Together, they turned to their best friend.

"Thanks, Hermione," said Ginny.

"Really," said Harry, "Thanks. I'm sorry we had to pull you into this."

"How long have we known each other?" asked Hermione. "Anything for you, Harry. Now, get out of here before you defile Kingsley's coffee table."

Harry looked at the table, which still had a fair amount of food on it, and then grinned at Ginny.

"Don't even think of it," called out Kingsley from across the room, behind his desk.

As Harry and Ginny made their way towards the door, Harry leaned into Ginny and quietly said, "I gave her my handcuffs."

"I'm sure we can figure out something," responded Ginny.

They were then caught by the voice of Rhonda. "Mr. Potter? Ginny?"

The couple turned to see her twirling the handcuffs around her finger.

"You should try food. It changes the whole experience," she said.

The couple turned to each other, green eyes meeting brown, and, smiling, scarpered out the office door, giggling.


End file.
